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Monday, August 9, 2010

Bone to Pick with Eat Pray Love

I guess I just haven't yet been in a situation that is so threatening to my sanity that I feel I have to be absolutely hurtful to a loved one in order to secure myself. And I pray to god it never happens! Then again, I am very willing and able to do serious work in order to restore balance, which I believe is fundamentally what our life consists of, series of these balance-attaining episodes. I do see the other perspective, I really do... That is one of my many flaws, I can see both sides of most problems crystal clearly, and oftentimes waver back and forth with indecision when taking a stance... But, I can almost certainly guarantee I wouldn't have behaved the way this woman did, chiefly because I wouldn't have married a man I wasn't myself around or didn't have the same goals as, or didn't have our growth trajectories aligned on the same general route!

Without trying to sound too self-righteous, I grew up with sacrifice and gratitude at the absolute core of my value system. While they're great qualities, perhaps they were instilled to a fault because now I feel guilt at times about deserving certain things, which in recent years I've made an effort to work on. I do happen to think people make a very big deal out of happiness, and like Bluebs and I have discussed so many times, Who says you are owed this extreme happiness to begin with? If you are grateful, and constantly understand that everything is amazing, and you set out to do these things while taking into consideration the effects on the people around you- isn't that enough to constitute a sense of happiness in your life? You really need more? You really have to travel to Indonesia to discover this?

Life is constant suffering. Everywhere! And I do feel that, to a certain extent, Eat Pray Love-girl behavior breeds a faux selfishness masked as self-preservation that I just can't comprehend... I think part of this also has to do with laziness. People don't like to do the nitty gritty work, the soul-searching, early on and constantly- the necessary work to really fix and stay fixed. You exchange one set of problems for another when you run away from a relationship, why not take it as an opportunity to create a tighter bond? I don't know... I feel that this quest for happiness results in a culture of entitled brats. Be grateful, honor yourself, spend your life with someone that does the same, respects you and sees in the distance what you see and you will be A.O.K. It won't always be bliss, but such is life.

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I'm an LA transplant now living in Brooklyn. I develop film projects by day, write at night, and have a dangerous predilection for vintage Robinson Golluber scarves- this blog serves as a tiny window to everything else I do when I'm not satisfying those first three passions. I'm trying to blog more and tweet less @annabelleqv. What about you?

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